Have you ever been suddenly put in a situation that you didn’t expect or know how to deal with?

I was the girl who had everything sorted. I did my assignments ahead of time. My room was generally pretty clean, and my grades pretty solid. I balanced numerous tutoring sessions with my running training, studies, and music. In my eyes, I had pretty much anything I could want or need, and I was very grateful for it. But once you have everything, you have everything to lose.

This year has by far been the toughest of my life, and that’s no exaggeration. It has been a roller-coaster of ups and downs; at times things looked like they were getting better, but then we turned just another bend in the track and I felt my stomach drop.

But I’m finally at the point where I’m getting back up. And I feel stronger than ever.

I may not be quite at the end of my journey yet (more hard times to come I’m sure), but for now I am proud of the progress I have made. So  how do we go from being knocked down to getting back up and being stronger than ever?

Or in other words:

“Grace, how do you become a one man wolf pack?”

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My tips for when the going gets tough:

  1. Remember that nothing in life is fair. If everything were fair, how hard we worked + how kind we were would equate to happiness and prosperity- but we all know that’s not the case. Bad things happen to all kinds of people, good and bad.
  2. See your friends. Spend some time focusing on other people, not yourself. Dwelling on your own struggles is a downward spiral- and it gets increasingly hard to get out of that pit once you’re in it.
  3. Say yes. Start saying yes to things you might not have before (okay, lay off the drugs and spirits), but once you start saying yes to things every door is open, you never know where you might end up.
  4. Tell somebody how much you appreciate them. When the going gets tough, true friends will pick you up and carry you the rest of the way. Don’t forget to thank the people who make you feel better. I am very biased but I do believe I am blessed with the greatest friends in the world, though I have probably only fully appreciated it in the last year.
  5. Change it up. Join a club that you never thought you would. Dye your hair. Go on a road-trip that you wouldn’t have taken otherwise. My lovely friends took me out to Piha to climb a waterfall in the holidays and it was the most picturesque thing I have experienced in a while. 10/10 would recommend.
  6. Take on a creative project. There are always ups and downs when you’re going through something challenging, but use the ups to reflect on the downs. I like to write lyrics and make music, and so I’ve been channeling my energy into planning out/ writing songs for an EP.
  7. Know you’re not the only one hurting. If it’s happened to you, it’s probably happened to someone else too. I’ve found common ground with many people I didn’t expect to just by opening up and being honest.
  8. Keep your faith. Keep faith in knowing that there are better things out there in the future. Whether it’s lost relationships, death, disease, or other depressants, know that you can and will come out of it okay. It just might take some time. 🙂

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